Sick Meron & MRI results

So things keep moving along and I am now bored out of my mind. The baby is doing great and I am now 31 weeks pregnant. I have to admit that at the beginning of this pregnancy I didn't really think the baby would make it. I was certain that I would miscarry (again) and I really tried to not get too attached to the idea of having a baby. Now, I really feel like I can fully embrace the thought. Feeling him move around all of the time is fantastic, but when he sleeps I get nervous. I know it is fairly normal to go a few hours with very little movement, but every time it happens I get all jittery and start doing kick counts. This happened last night. I didn't feel any movement for over 2 hours and I was so nervous about it that it almost made me puke. I drank some juice and laid down for awhile; he woke up and went bonkers from the sugar in the juice.

Anyway, the result from my MRI is back and not good. It showed some strange white spots on different portions on my brain. What those spots mean my OB/GYN couldn't tell me, but she has gotten me a rush appointment with the neurologist who reviewed my MRI tomorrow so he can give me the specifics. I am still having some problems with dizziness and mild confusion from time to time. Luckily, it is not all of the time, but when it does happen, it's like being drunk. You know, the type of drunk that is just past being tipsy or buzzed.

This past week has been a little difficult, too, because Meron caught the flu. She was pretty sick for a couple of days, but is a lot better now. She is no longer running fevers and is starting to cough up all of the junk in her chest. It's tough when the kids are sick, because I really have to stay away from them. More than anything, I want to cuddle them and baby them, but can't. I can't risk having any further auto-immune reactions. My body can react to the antibodies they produce for themselves when they're sick as well as any virus or bacteria that they carry. Normally, I just deal with the consequences (fevers, rashes, & swollen joints for a couple of days) and just cuddle them anyway, but, with trying to keep Ben safe and my brain intact, I now must avoid them. It makes me feel like a bad mother.