Hospital Stays and Behavior Issues...

Things are definitely moving along and we are now at 35 weeks gestation. These past few weeks have not been easy.

My Neurologist has advised that the white spots on my MRI are areas of my brain that have been affected by the Anti-phospholipid Antibody Syndrome. At some point in time (or several points) my blood was too thick and caused a lack of oxygen in those parts of my brain. They are permanently damaged. That being said, those spots are not causing the current issues that I am having, and should not be causing no major problems at all. My current issues are being caused by thick blood, which has unexpectedly been further mitigated (more on that below.)

I am also under the care of a Rhuematologist who is reviewing all of my medical history to see what steps we should take once the baby is born to deal with the auto-immune issues I am experiencing. The hope is that once Ben is born, most of it will disappear and I will just go back to functioning normally (sans rashes, headaches, and joint pain).


On the OB side, things have slipped downhill in the past two weeks. Two weeks ago I developed a UTI which caused some contractions and fever. That was treated pretty quickly, but within a couple of days, I went into pre-term labor... big time. I woke up on the 23rd with contractions that were about 6 mins apart. I tried all of the tricks to get them to calm down (ie. laying on my side, drinking lots of water, warm bath, meditation) but none of it worked. By the time I called the doctor the contractions were about 4 mins apart and so strong it felt as if I were being kicked in the back with each one, and stomach took on a cone shape. The doctors had us come in to their office at the hospital. We were only there for about 15 mins before they sent me down to labor and delivery. I was immediately admitted, and hooked up to monitors and IVs (this was around 9 am). I was given magnesium sulfate to stop the contractions and took a few hours to really kick in. I was also given shots of steroids to assist with the babies lungs just in case they were not able to stop the labor. Antibiotics were also administered in case I was Group B Strep positive (I have since been tested and am negative). The magnesium sulfate is supposed to make one feel horrible, but as it turned out, I had very little ill effects from it. In fact, by the next day (still in the hospital), I felt better than I had in over a month. As it turns out, although I was on the magnesium sulfate, I felt better because the steroids had severely reduced the impact of all of the auto-immune issues that I had been dealing with. It's funny, because from what I had read and what friends had said about Magnesium Sulfate, I had questioned the nurses on whether or not it was actually in my IV bag (I'm sure they loved the implication that they had made a mistake). Since this trip to the hospital, I have had no further issues with feeling drunk, randomly getting dizzy, or massive headaches. It's been quite an improvement. Normally, pre-term laboring women are required to stay in the hospital for several days after receiving the mag-sulf, but since I was doing so well they released me the following evening.


After that trip to the hospital, feeling great, I was determined to not repeat the whole pre-term labor thing, and really tried to do nothing... absolutely nothing... which sucked, because I was feeling so much better. Things went well for several days, well, until my appointment with the high-risk specialist that does my weekly ultra-sounds on Wednesday of last week. The nurse only had the little wand on my belly for a minute or so before she realized that the fluid around the baby was too low. Normal amniotic fluid should measure between 5cm and 25cm (not completely sure on that top number, but I know it's close to that), but the fluid around Ben was measuring around 4cm. The previous week it had measured around 7 cm. So, of course, I was sent to labor and delivery, again. I seriously thought that I would be giving birth that day, but my regular OB doctor met me at the hospital and advised that they were going to try to get the fluid levels back up by putting me on a IV overnight. I was admitted, but L&D was full. I was placed in a bed in the hall of L&D... seriously. I felt like I was on an episode of Scrubs or something. Doug said that we must be some of the first people to fall under the "public option" ( http://twitpic.com/n9xbt ). I was admitted around 10 am and they weren't able to get me a room until around 6 pm that night. Which meant every time I had to go to the restroom (which was quite often given the amount IV fluids they were pumping through me), I had to walk down the full length of L&D hall in my hospital gown (with unshaven legs, I might add) to get to the nurses bathroom which luckily was very nice. It was funny and embarrassing.


The next morning, they did another ultrasound and measured the fluids around the baby at a little over 7cm and I was released. Since then things have gone okay. I regularly have contractions now, but wouldn't necessarily call it labor. The contractions come in little spurts which almost prompt me to call the doctor, but then calm down and spread out. There is probably not an hour in the day that I don't get at least 3 strong contractions (more than 5 per hour over a two hour period is supposed to be a trip to L&D). This, of course, has was discussed with my OB doctor yesterday at my appointment and it was as I expected. Now that we are past 34 weeks gestation, if the I were to go in to full labor again, they would not stop it. Also, while at my appointment, they measured the fluids around the baby and it was down to right at 6cm. Still within normal range, but definitely dropping. I have an appointment with the high-risk specialist on Wednesday and fully expect to be admitted to L&D again for low fluids. I am not sure if they will go the same route again or if they will decide it is time to go ahead and deliver him. I think it will really depend on how he is doing. Ben, thus far, has been a trooper. Through all of this, he has shown absolutely no signs of stress which is fantastic. I just keep hoping that I can keep him in there a few more weeks so that when he is born he will be able to come home right away. If he were born now, he would likely be quite jaundiced and may have difficulty breathing and eating on his own. His size, however, should not be an issue. At his last measurements, 3 weeks ago, he was just under 5lbs. They will measure him again on Wednesday, and it is likely that he will be over 6lbs.


Through all of this the girls have been doing fairly well but that is not to say that it has had no impact. Leigh has been super worried, and it is obvious that it is taking a bit of a toll on her. Meron is definitely acting out in response to it, which seems to be causing Leigh even more stress. When Meron starts acting out, Leigh actually (on her own) has been trying to distract Meron and keep her in line. It sad and sweet to see... to know that Leigh is so worried about me that she is trying to keep Meron from causing me any stress when most days Leigh would prefer to avoid Meron completely when she is acting out. Overall, though, I do expect it, and Meron's behavior is not stressing me. So, I am trying to ensure that Leigh knows she does not need to worry about it, that she doesn't need to help keep Meron in line; I'm not sure she believes me. With all of this going on, Doug and I decided to ask his Mom to come and help out with the girls. She flew in Halloween night and Meron's behavior had improved dramatically since then (at least at home).

The other issue that we have been working through is Meron's behavior at school. Doug and I chose at the beginning of the year to not express any of our concerns about Meron's behavior to her teacher. It was a hard decision, because I felt as if we were not properly preparing her teacher, but I also did not want to bias her teacher against her. So, a couple of weeks ago, when Meron's teacher approached Doug after school to advise that they were having difficulty with Meron not concentrating or keeping her hands to herself, we were not surprised. We had hoped that she would be one of those kids that acts differently at school, but to no avail. Doug had a conference with her teacher a couple of days later, and Meron is most definitely displaying all of the same behavior issues at school that she is at home. We are working through these, but sometimes it feels like a one step forward two steps back situation (recently, with all of my medical issues, it has felt more like a 10 steps back situation). Somedays, it really feels as if she has absolutely no self control. One of the major rules that we have had to develop for her is that she must know a reason for every action that she makes. Now, I know, that seems simple enough, but it has been a real issue. Her rule goes some thing like this. Meron must be able to give us a reason for anything that she does... even if it is something as simple as moving a chair. If the reason for her action is logical to her, then she should do it. If the reason for her action is either antagonistic or destructive, then she should not do it. For example, Meron decides she would like to move one of our kitchen chairs accross the room. Good reason: Meron needs to use the chair to reach something that belongs to her on the kitchen counter. Bad reason: Meron would like to move the chair so that it will be in the way when Leigh and her friend dance through the room the next time their pretend parade comes through possibly causing one of them to run into and definitely interrupt their playing. Both of these incidents have happened and as it was although we spoke to her about not doing things to be antagonistic, there was no punishment for the latter because she was at least able to provide us with a reason (albeit a very unacceptable reason). This is a minor example. I have major examples... some that have involved actual violence on her part, but we are working through them. I feel lucky that Leigh is still quite a bit bigger than Meron, which seems to disuade Meron a bit when she decides to go that route. I am also grateful that, although Leigh is not likely to (and has not yet to) start any type of violence between the two of them, she does not hesitate to defend herself. Both girls are at least admonished in these situations, but mine and Doug's standpoint on this has been to punish the one that hits (kicks, pinches, shoves) first. Thus far, this has always been Meron. I also feel lucky, because although these incidents have increased lately, they still happen much less often than they occurred between my siblings and I... they are also happening less often than I see the neighbor children physically fighting with one another (siblings or no).
I am always open to other parents advice, so if you go any for me I am open ears.