I have just finished reading the book "Someone Knows My Name" by Lawrence Hill. It is a beautifully written novel about a girl taken from her village in African and sold into slavery.
For those of you who have not read this book, I highly recommend it. For those of you who have, my biggest fear is that there is a beautiful and strong woman in Ethiopia who views me as the Witherspoons. I met her, and it didn't seem as if she felt that way at the time, but what if????
What if she really does see things that way now? or starts to see things that way in the future?
What if SweetPea begins to feel that way? Does she feel that way now and not know how to express it?
Staying Centered at Christmas
7 years ago
4 comments:
I'm not saying that this person won't come to view you that way (though I doubt it), or that Sweetpea won't have issues, but what you're talking about here isn't unique to African adoptions. This is the fundamental moral anguish that, from time to time, torments adoptive parents everywhere (or so I suspect -I can only really speak for us). Meeting the birth mother just kind of drives the point home more quickly.
The thing I try to remember is that, irrespective of our decision to adopt, a mother had already made the decision that her child would be better off with someone else raising her. I would venture to say that this is not a decision undertaken lightly, even in Ethiopia.
And, OK, the other thing you need to remember is - you're not a slaveholder !
Thank you, John.
It's a powerful book, no doubt. I doubt, however, that Sweet Pea's mother will view you as the Witherspoons. It's not to say she will always have positive feelings about the experience-but, I doubt she felt you stole her.
I also don't know how Sweet Pea will react to all of it when she's older. Odds are it may not be as big of an issue as you anticipate it will be. But, if it is-you guys are loving and open and you can help her get through any difficulties and mourning she may (and will) experience.
Mine too.
Post a Comment